Ruffled Feathers
by innocide
Summary: A rant from the mouth of Shinichi Kudo's own guardian angel, who has a lot to say on matters revolving around the tantei. Reviews are mightily appreciated, as this piece could use refining.


I haven't posted anything in awile, and while this project started as a huge bolt of inspiration and enthusiasm, I'm now doubting its execution. There's a lot of possibility here, but it needs refining.

So what I really want on this is feedback; constructive criticism. (Especially on the last few paragraphs…which feel very so-so to me.) Anything you guys can tell me on how to improve is very welcome indeed. There's a chance I'll re-write this entirely; I may turn it into a full story, but first it needs some coddling and slapping around, if you know what I mean. The creative process at work.

_Guardian Angel-Corresponding Human_

_Chimaaka-Shinichi_

_Mashiro-Ai_

_Asori-Ayumi_

_Oriana-Kazuha_

_Ayame-Ran_

_Etumaru-Heiji_

"_If there's one thing Kudo Shinichi has, it's luck-that or one seriously dedicated guardian angel."_

**Ruffled Feathers**

If there's one thing that sucks about my job, it's that it probably won't end for awhile yet.

I'm very good at it you see, and that's saying something. I _am _the guardian angel of Kudo Shinichi after all.

After all these years, I'm certainly aware how ironic it is that my name, Chimaaka, is written as "one thousand red truths". I've lost count of how many bloody cases this boy has solved, but if we ever get to a thousand it'll be a day worth noting.

I'll answer a common question right away—do guardian angels have wings? Yes, but not the way you're thinking. In the Court of Angels (court my ass—more like a conglomerate) every rank is different in function, so we may or may not have wings; even if we do they may function differently from those of another rank. Mine are used for causing synchronities—what humans call coincidences. Yes, it does come in handy, thank you very much. Nothing is so beneficial for protecting someone than the power to influence various happenings.

Another common question—was I human once? Yeah, but I don't remember anything about it. If I ever get promoted, I may be allowed to have my human memories back, but for now they're on file. I think Angelic Bookkeeping must be the most boring job ever. At least Demonic Bookkeeping would have some interesting stuff stored—but don't get you're hopes up; there's not really some accountant down in "hell" keeping track of misdeeds. Things on this planet can get so exaggerated; the afterlife isn't as exciting as you'd think.

So I have nothing but my name, my wings, my ethereal body, and the assurance that this is the right thing to be doing with my time. And after a while, I stated to agree with that royal ass Gabriel; it is worthwhile.

But don't tell him I said that.

But back to the topic at hand. Kudo Shinichi? Nuttiest case ever. Passing other angels on the street, they hover over their cases and are glad that they don't have it as bad as me. I'm well known for being "that girl stuck with the walking dead boy". Now, I've grilled his mom's angel a million times over; I mean, c'mon! Something MUST have happened while she was pregnant with Shin to make him this way! (Sadly, that old geezer just won't talk—he keeps all of Miss Perfect's secrets) I can't tell if death is drawn to him or if he's drawn to death, but it's all I can do just to keep this kid alive at all!

Granted, it's not all my doing. That "shrinking incident"? As much as I'd like to claim that I'm responsible, I'm not. I tried to save him, failed, and then what do you know, he saves himself. Lucky shot, that one. Somehow, I suspect Ran Mouri has something to do with it; if I didn't know better I'd say she had wings better than mine.

Which is not to say I haven't been useful at other times. I keep that boy out of trouble plenty well! Well enough, anyway, judging from my bonuses.

Like say, his very first case as "Conan Edogawa"? That dog that led the others to Conan and the kidnapper was under direct orders from me. Animals can be so much smarter than people sometimes.

The explosion in the video game convention...well I wasn't really much help there, but I did swat the change out of his hand. I was kind of running low on ideas....but it seemed like a good idea at the time. And I guess it worked out ok...

When he first turned back into his old self? It was all I could do just to keep his heart beating, and that's the hardest sort of thing to alter.

Or the little things—keeping him strong for Ran, for instance. I'm prouder and prouder of him every day in this respect. He is a little nosy, I'll admit. But it keeps him on his toes, worrying about her.

I could go on all day with this list. It's a tough job, after all. Like that time he leaned out a window to demonstrate how the murderer killed the victim? I was ready to kill him myself after that, he gave me a heart attack and I'm already DEAD! But sometimes I can't blame him—I was quite pleased with him after he risked himself to save Ran from that bandage-faced axe murderer!

Talking like this makes me realize how weird my job is… but I'm not alone I suppose. Ran's angel, Ayame, is a lifesaver. I can't tell you how many times we've helped each other out—Ran and Conan together attract more trouble than a barrel of…something.

Granted, at first she wasn't too keen on having my case living with hers; I understand that she was afraid of the consequences, but she didn't have to be so frosty about it for so long! I don't think she was 100% on my side about the matter until the whole axe-murderer thing. She considered it payback for the whole "Conan Edogawa only made it through his first day because of Ran" issue.

Still, I've never seen her so shook up as the day Ran was almost drowned by that guy at the villa—I don't remember which one, these people visit so many damn villas—emphasis on the ALMOST. I mean, the guy was just using Ran for a way to seal his M.O., but Ayame didn't know that. So while Conan cradled Ran for dear life, I held onto a crying angel. If there's anyone I would think of as having low self-esteem, it's Ayame. But with Shinichi "gone", she didn't think she was helping Ran at all.

Honestly, I begged to differ. Ever since then, we've been "BFFs" again, so to speak.

And Asori-- boy does that girl owe me favors. I'm practically doing her job for her, keeping Ayumi safe and sound. But it comes with the territory I suppose; I think I'm the only girl Shinichi has never endangered.

Speaking of favors…no, I don't wanna talk about it. I refuse to discuss HIM. That high-and-mighty ass Etumaru. Thinks he can just take his case for a ride and damn the consequences.

I know for a fact he does not have the authority to damn anything. I checked his file. He had no more influence than I do.

He's so selfish and unhelpful. Scratch that; he's TOO helpful! Now, his job is pretty similar to mine, being that he's the guardian angel of Hattori Heiji. And he thinks he just rocks that job to death. I however, have spoken to Oriana, who is in charge of Toyama Kazuha's case, so I can assure you that one day, that Hattori boy will be hit by one of those falling cadavers he's so very fond of. I mean, Etumaru's fond of them. I'm trying to get evidence so I can prove to the higher-ups that he's using his powers to orchestrate these corpse drops. It must be breaking some kind of law to endanger your charge on purpose while some people have to work so hard to keep it the opposite.

Oriana has confirmed however that neither she nor Etumaru are responsible for that "dangling-off-a-cliff" event. So, in case any of you wondered, that was just an accident. Honest. Unless one of the Archangels got bored. Who can say, with them?

So anyway—godammit, I'm talking about him—I supposedly owe Etumaru a whole bunch of favors. I'll confess that Heiji was a big help when Conan was dangling off that balcony—at yet another villa (what is up with that? Has anyone counted how many villas/mansions/castles/etc my case has been to? Cuz I sure haven't.)—and that it was good of him to give Heiji advance warning on the fact that Conan was going to be stabbed. HOWEVER, that does not give him to right to wave it in my face.

Oriana says one day he'll trade in all these "favors" for a date. I told her to stop making up romance where there isn't any and worry about a more pressing romantic problem—namely, Kazuha. Poor Oriana spends hours a week begging Etumaru to give Heiji a romantic revalation. Nevertheless, we all agree that Heiji's had time and time again to have one of those for himself, and if none of these near death events sparked any admittances, than we can't do much for him.

Seriously, there's nothing worse for us than romance. I mean, I'm not a damn cupid. We never see any of them around here…they must be put off by the whole "death" thing. Pity. We could use a few of those cute arrows. Would solve a lot of problems. Except the Ai-related ones. I don't think anything but more time in the sun can solve that girl's traumas, no matter how much Mashiro may try to defrost her, poor boy. I feel REALLY sorry for him. He doesn't get enough credit… he's had too many close calls. He was ready to throw a party when Ai said that she wanted amnesia so she could "stay with you (Shinichi) like this forever…"

I'll never forget the face he made when she said she was kidding. He looked like he needed a hug… a really big hug. Though, not as big a hug as Ai herself needs. Face it, they all need a hug. We all need a hug.

In the case of romance though, all our charges (in what is referred to by the higher ups as the "Detective Cast", much to my non-amusement) seem to be caught up on a winding road of close calls. Forever and ever dramatic music seems to fortell a big change, and yet so rarely do we see one. Or perhaps my view is skewed; so many huge things happen around here it's very likely the lot of us are demoting them to small things. With death and despair forever circling them, is it possible our charges are blinded to the good things, the little things? Their miseries hang like feathers over their happy times, and it seems sometimes even honesty, a candid moment, cannot save them.

And then the sun shines again; the waves crash like laughter on the shore and we feel silly for worrying so much about these people; more and more they have each other, even if not everyone's trust can be guaranteed. In quiet moments, when Conan looks at Ran like he looks like the stars at night, it becomes clear, water in a glass; everything HAS to work out fine, not because of us, but because of him. Shinichi has the power, the means, the assistance, and the drive to achieve his goal, and his princess will always be waiting.

I suppose there is no one of the "Cast" of whom this is not true in some way. They all can achieve. Their prizes are waiting. And one day, push will go to shove and the blades will fall.

And victory will be sweet.

**(Fin)**

Reviews are appreciated; in this case I'm very interested in improving and refining, or even evolving this piece, so specific comments are not going to be seen as annoying. Feel free to nitpick.


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